October is Bullying Awareness Month and Business Bullies By Mary Ann Cadorna
Bullies are a fact of life, yet, I don’t hear much about business, entrepreneurship, and click-bullies and how they can impact productivity, performance, sales, and your life.
We’ve heard so much about kids getting bullied in school. Ah, but bullies grow up, and guess what? They become adult bullies! I believe bullying, like prejudice, and hate, are learned behaviors; by direct experience or negative reinforcement, bullies are not born. They are made. OK, that said, you’ve made it passed the childhood bullies into adulthood, and now you’re in the business world, and low and behold, what do you find? Adult bullies, so let’s visit who and what those bullies are.
BUSINESS BULLY: You are in the workplace, be it bullying co-workers or supervisors and management, top or critical positions, in companies that use their might to intimidate you into subordination. Using might as right to manage or get their people to do their bidding!
ENTREPRENEURIAL BULLY: It’s their way and jump on the highway bullies, as they race off with your ideas, your clients, and your potential royalties. They use their cunning to claim what’s intellectually yours. Under this situation, you may never recover, and it can be at the loss of your full earning potential because there is no honor. If there’s no trust or loyalty then surely you won’t get paid royalties.
CLICK BULLY: In the business world, they are the adult gangs of what I have coined as click-bullies where the meanies join ranks (status quo) and close ranks, where they trash talk, share the bias/prejudice and revel in the comradery of their moral degradation of a person they have decided to negatively target.
INTENT: Whether you are confronting individual or group intimidation in the arena of bullying, they desire to use their power to intimidate, control, and destroy your self-esteem! How you deal with it depends on the politics of the given culture. Be cognizant, is that person the head honcho, connected, or related to the top echelon? If so, they will be well protected and insulated from reprimand or corrective action. If it’s an entrepreneurial bully, their intimidation is at the cost of your business, and your money or intellectual property is at risk. However, if it’s the adult gang of click-bullies, you are outnumbered, and their force can hurt you or drive you out.
EMOTIONAL COST: As a result, you will be emotionally affected and left with one of four choices, 1. Put up and shut up (stay intimidated), 2. Complain (be singled out), 3. Stand up and fight (be an outcast), 4. Leave under stress/duress (escape)! Each choice has a consequence but life is short. You can’t afford to waste years under the weight of being bullied. As they say, “If you don’t give it back, you pass it on,” and most likely, it will be to the loved ones you go home to!
COURAGE: It takes courage to stand up to bullies, and in our world where everyone needs their job, it’s tough, but eventually, your mental and physical health is at risk, and stress is a killer! Better to live with the courage to stand up or walk away from business bullies, entrepreneurial bullies, or click-bullies than to live in fear and the health risk caused by stress due to the puissance of their actions. No successful leader made it by staying and suffering under the heavy weight of a bully or bullies. Life is a gift that is measured by time, and your time on earth is finite, so you cannot afford to waste years being bullied, dispirited, and unhappy.
BULLY the WORD: Ironic, the first four letters of the word bully are BULL for what you have to take, and the last letter is Y for you! So remember, the word bully has no power if you take the Y for you out of it.
LIVE your Y: So free your Y from the word bullY and live your life without fear of intimidation. And yes there is a cost, and it takes courage to lose the business bullies and reclaim your self-esteem and self-respect. Ultimately, you, your loved ones, your health, and your bank account will thank you too! And when you rid yourself of those co-dependent-intimidators, the only question you will ask yourself is Y why did you wait so long?
By Mary Ann Cadorna – San Fran Mary Ann’s Horse Sensical Quotes and Anecdotes © October 28, 2015
Community Out Reach & Public Advocacy Chair: Commercial Brokers of Northern California
National Association of Professional Women – VIP – San Mateo Chapter President
Entrepreneur – Leadership – Influencer – Public Relations -Radio Personality – Radio Talk Show Host.
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maryanncadorna@gmail.com 415-810-1888